Separating the Man from His Clothes

Not long after I started dating David, my mom would often ask how things were going. I’d rave about his charm, his sense of humor, and his good looks, but then, almost instinctively, I’d mention his clothes. Yes, I admit it—I was a bit shallow. At the time, I was studying fashion design at FIT, surrounded by edgy hipsters, and the way my boyfriend dressed mattered to me.
David was almost too perfectly put together. I vividly remember the time he picked me up from school in a silk suit with fine turquoise stripes and a matching shirt. As a man seven years older with a “serious” job, his wardrobe reflected his professionalism. I felt hesitant to introduce him to my friends, worried they’d judge him based on his bold, over-the-top suits.
My mom, ever the wise one, wasn’t concerned about his wardrobe. “Is he kind? Is he smart?” she’d ask. “You can change the clothes, but you can’t change the man. If he makes you feel good, that’s what matters.” Of course, she was right. When you find someone who treats you with love and respect, clothes don’t define them. But let’s be honest—it did matter a little!
David lived in Texas at the time and worked with a stylist from one of Dallas's best menswear stores. When I gently suggested a wardrobe update, he laughed, “Don’t be silly! My stylist knows what he’s doing.” Fair enough. So, we left it at that—until our first trip to Paris.

Fashion runs deep in my blood (blame my French roots). I’m not obsessed with it, but I’ve always appreciated how effortlessly French men put themselves together. I suggested he try a crisp white shirt with French cuffs and a navy blazer paired with jeans. “Jeans with cufflinks? Are you serious?” he asked. Our styles were miles apart, and I, being the stubborn one, barely spoke to him for a day.
But David, being David, didn’t let it linger. He listened and promised to consider it. We got married, and over time, he slowly embraced the change.
Clothes may not define who you are, but they do tell a story. His silk suits reflected his living in Texas, my suggestions reflected my Parisian upbringing, and together, we created a wardrobe that reflects our life—comfortable, simple, and thoughtful. With the right essentials, getting dressed becomes second nature. By that, I mean he created a canvas on which to wear my accessories. :)
Cufflinks were quickly adopted, but bracelets took more convincing. I remember the first time I suggested he wears a bracelet. “Absolutely not!” he said. Today, he proudly wears three of my designs like trophies. His belts have become understated conversation starters. He has become the epitome of the ZADEH man.
The other day, our daughter looked at him and said, “Dad, you look so refined.” He smiled and replied, “It’s all your mother.” And I added, “It’s all about your accessories.”

But honestly, it’s not about the clothes or the accessories—it’s about the man who wears them. The one who trusts you, listens when it counts, and lets you *roar* unapologetically, just to see you happy...and have peace. :)